Adventure Hike

Today I went for an adventure hike with my friend, Melissa.  I call it an adventure hike because you start out with just an idea of how the day will go, and end up far from that.  You take risks and get lost and for a second are not quite sure you know the way back.  Then you look at your friend picking up a snake "to save it from being stepped on" and you know you are in good hands. 

I expressed my fears of not being totally sure where our car was to Melissa.  She replied by telling me she was not worried at all.  It was nice out and besides there are no bears here.  Well, there might be bears here, she backtracked.  I think you are supposed to curl up into the fetal position and not move, she explained.  But I wouldn't do that, her eyes were big, I would run like hell.

Great.  What would I do!?

I soon forgot to worry about bears because we came across a beautiful wood bridge that looked like it went on forever.  We seemed to be in the middle of a forgotten forest.  Not one had passed us in over an hour.  Above us were gorgeous blue skies with streams of sunshine being filtered by yellow, red and orange leaves.  The sun came through the protective trees just enough to make us warm on our cool fall day. 

Our feet were crunching over leaves and sticks and stones as we came up to our bridge, our yellow brick road to home, or wherever it was we wanted to go.  We crossed the bridge despite the fact that every five or six planks we moved over, one was broken in half by water damage.  It was especially thrilling when a plank actually cracked underneath my foot.  After what seemed like a very long journey of praying that each piece of wood stay whole, we got to the end.  Looking around we realized we were right back where we had started our hike.  It was perfect.

On the way back to the car, a hawk soared maybe 10 feet above our heads.  It was kind of incredible.

Thanks, Melissa.

Chocolate Cake

I had already decided that yesterday and today would be my goof-off days.  Just relax and enjoy your freedom, I said to myself.  You deserve a break from harsh reality.  Next week you will dive into your future.  Next week you will find yourself.  Next week everything will fall into place.*  Well, it's hard to do nothing!

I woke up early**, visited with my cousin in the morning, made some networking attempts and checked Facebook more times than I am going to tell you about.***  With nothing left to do, I decided to bake a chocolate cake.  It came out amazing, tasted like heaven and other than that whole crumbling into pieces part, was perfect.  Which brings me to my analogy... 

Life is a chocolate cake. 

Just because it falls to pieces, does not mean it doesn't taste delicious.  Also, I whipped up some homemade frosting, and while applying this to my broken masses of chocolate, I discovered that it was able to hold the chunks together and in the end mask the ridges of the earthquake.**** 

*****

Meanwhile, I no longer have co-workers to bring in baked goods for.  Anyone want some cake?  I use FedEx.

* No, I don't blindly believe this.

** 9:30AM

*** I am still not telling how many times!

**** Me attempting to flip the cake onto a cooling rack
***** This is absolutely NOT what my cake looks like. Mine looks better******

****** Not true

Robinson

I used to rip my calendar's last month's pictures out and hang them in my cubicle.  A polar bear family, a lone wolf, an African sunset, a hot air balloon, palm trees in the tropics, anything that made me smile, and made my co-workers smile...  This is one of many tell tale signs I might not belong in corporate America.

Last night I was cleaning out my cube and I began to take down each picture and put it on my friend's desks as a last good-bye.  They were not there, as it was 6:30PM- marking the latest I have ever stayed at the office.

It was just me and Robinson, the afternoon janitor who comes by each day to empty our trash bins.  Sometimes he would leave me Mexican candies next to my keyboard, and more recently a post-it note with a red flower, (personally hand drawn), next to my mouse.  We always said hello, how are you and good-bye.  It was a nice relationship and a good way for me to end, and for him to start, our day.

When I told him it was my last day and he began to cry, it came as a bit of a shock to me.  His english is not perfect so he held up a finger and repeated "sorry, sorry" as he backed away and the tears spilled out. I did not know what to do.  He explained to me, in broken english, that he had been working there for 11 years and it was hard for him to see people come and go.  He said he considered me a friend and he is only human, so this makes him sad that I will not be there anymore.  I ended up giving him one of my calendar pictures, a red flower, because he is a friend.  I think we would all be surprised how many people we affect everyday and this was just another reminder for me.

At the end of the day, I knew I would be missed. 

By the way, today marks the official first day of the rest of my life.  Wish me luck.

HR at the BAR

I went into my last Human Resources meeting with a pretty good attitude. I was pretty much fresh out of tears having already filled up two buckets that morning. So, I went in smiling. Lorie, my representative, was smiling as well and very kind. We soon found out we had grown up on the very same street, although 15 years apart. I even enjoyed this fact as she handed me my final packet to sign. We discussed her adorable shoes and how my co-workers and I were going out for a happy hour after work.
"Where are you having it?"
"At the new place down the road."
"Oh, I haven't checked it out yet..."
"Well, Lorie, you are more than welcome to join us" I laughed.
She laughed, too. "Oh, no, I don't want to give anyone a heart attack..I know my nickname is the grim reaper."
Hahaha. We both laughed and I told her to have a great night as I shut her office door behind me.

So, wasn't I surprised when Lorie walked into the bar. So was everyone else. She threw back one beer like a champion, said hello to everyone and then left for an early business dinner.

I actually enjoyed the fact that she came. (though I can't speak for everyone) It took a lot of guts. The whole thing was just another reminder to me that this situation is not easy for anyone. Not even the grim reaper.

Water Cooler

Isn't it funny how you spend all your time looking for a job, only to get one and then immediately begin to say things like, "Is it Monday already?" and "The weekend just went by too quickly." "Always does, Joe, always does." (laughs by the water cooler) Joe is every co-worker you and I ever had, by the way.

Take a freaking vacation day, Joe. In the end no one is going to care that you slept til ten, splurged on a mocha frappuccino in lieu of your homemade brew, and finally found out what daylight looks like at 2 PM on a Tuesday. Not your boss, not your mother, not your neighbor and certainly not your dog who will take extra pleasure in a mid-day hike.

What they will notice, in the end, is that on Wednesday you have something exciting to say.

Think about what you have to say. Is it inspiring?

Take a day off, Joe. You can hang with me.

*Side note- After watching the movie, The Departed, tonight- This entire blog entry is written and should be read with a Boston accent. (Including this side note.) Go back and try it-Spice up your Monday.

Today is Friday!

Not that it matters... wahh wahhh.

Okay, I'm done being a Deb Downer!!





Today I am making a list.





1. Make a list

2. Exercise


3. Cook for friends/family


4. Find a job


5. Enjoy my time off


6. Volunteer


7. Chase the leaves


8. Visit my friends and family across the country, and close by.

Any other suggestions, guys??

I want to head down the right path.

I Had a Beer at Lunch Today...

This probably does not sound so crazy to you, but I do not drink mid-work day on a regular basis. It makes me tired mostly, not to mention the act of "holding it together" when you are tipsy is incredibly hard. (Yes, I did mention one beer and tipsy in the same blog)

Of course, this is no regular day. Today Human Resources paid me a visit.

Oh, HR, thank you for stopping by. You never come to chat anymore. Have you been busy, HR, laying off my friends and planning out my death sentence? Oh, it must be so hard for you. Tell me all about it, HR.

Oh, you're right, it will be better to just read about it in this handy packet you gave me. Thanks so much for stopping by, HR.

So, there you have it. I'll be gone in a week. Drink up, friends, for it is time for a new beginning!

To be continued...

I Got The Finger Today..

At least I think I did. It was so casual that he may have been scratching his neck. Judging from the fact that he was middle aged and in a blue minivan, I'm going to guess it was the finger. Also, I cut him off. Driving is hard before coffee.

Anyway, when it actually 'hurt my feelings' that this nameless, faceless, minivan driving, sad little man gave me the finger- it struck me just how sensitive I really am these days.

For the record, my name is not Sal, or Sally for that matter, but I am sensitive. I am one of many who recently lost their job. Like so many others in my nameless, faceless, big insurance company, I am a dead man walking. I know my job has been eliminated and I am waiting to find out what happens next. It's exciting, really.

So, at this point, I forgive you minivan man. I am positive that by now you have lost your job, your wife has lost their job, or you have watched friends and your own co-workers around you lose their jobs. In any case, consider the finger forgotten, bud.

-SS